Tag Archives: races

Here’s what he said…

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My husband, Al, who is the editor of the Echo Press newspaper, wrote about his experience running the half-marathon in Las Vegas. The story, along with a picture of him running the race, ran in the Opinion section of the newspaper last Friday.

His story is very vivid and almost makes it feel as if you could have been running right beside him. I would love for all of you to read it, so here is a link to the story from the newspaper’s website: Highs and lows of a half-marathon.

Check it out and let me know your thoughts!

Thanks!

The results are in…

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I completed my first half-marathon. I actually did it.

And here’s my medal to prove it:

My medal!

So, I suppose you’re wondering how it went. Well, let me tell you…

First of all, I finished and I am extremely proud of myself for doing so…despite what it may sound like when you read this. I am happy I did it. I don’t have any regrets. And, despite the fact that I said I was only going to do one in my life, my husband and I have already decided to do another one. We are planning on signing up for another Rock ‘n’ Roll series one, but this time, it’s going to be in San Jose, California. We are going to Napa, California next October to celebrate our 5-year anniversary and San Jose just happens to be a host city for a Rock ‘n’ Roll half-marathon. And, San Jose is somewhat close to Napa. Logistically, it just seemed to work out!

Anyway, back to the Las Vega Rock ‘n’ Roll half-marathon.

At the expo the day before the race, which is where we picked up our race packets and swag bag, we both ended up changing our estimated times, which also meant changing corrals. At this race, runners lined up in corrals according to their estimated finish time. At first, we estimated that Al would finish in two and half hours and I would finish in three hours. But, based on previous races, we decided to up our times to Al finishing in two hours and myself finishing in two and a half hours.

This meant that Al changed from corral number 24 to corral 14 and I changed from corral 36 to corral 27. There was a two-minute delay between the start of each corral, which helped immensely with not having a crowded course. This was greatly appreciated. Neither of us felt like squished sardines when we started out.

The race started at 4:30 p.m. Al crossed the starting line shortly before 5 p.m. – official time was 4:51 p.m. I crossed the starting line a little after 5 p.m. – official time was 5:16 p.m. We know our times because I was getting text message updates on Al (which I didn’t look at until after the race was done), and my son, Brandon, was getting updates on me. A couple of other people were following me also, which was really cool because I got messages from them immediately after the race was done.

Here are some messages from my son – before the race and after the race:

Text messages from my son

Loved the thumbs up from him when I finished. It made my heart melt and eyes fill with tears.

The start of the race was okay. The wind started to pick up and it almost looked as if a storm was heading our way. I checked my phone for weather details while waiting in the start line and learned that there were wind advisories – wind was blowing anywhere from 20 to 25 miles per hour with gusts up to 35 mph.

Yep. It was just a tish windy. And I think it played a factor in my running. When the wind wasn’t at my back, it was tough to push through.

I started the race out at a nice even tempo. At the advice of several friends and other runners, I took in the sites and the sounds. I knew I wasn’t going for a win, so I decided to take it easy. Too easy maybe.

I kept a pretty even pace – about an 11 minute mile – until mile seven. It’s here I hit the wall. Not sure what happened. But the wall was big and I hit it hard. For miles seven, eight, nine and 10, my pace was closer to a 12.5 minute mile. At mile 11 and 12, it was jumped to a 16 minute mile – yes, I was pretty close to walking, but yet I kept plugging along, one foot in front of another – VERY slowly. I stopped at every single water/Gatorade stop between miles 10 and the finish line. There was a GU energy stop, but I didn’t grab any. I should have.

The last mile to mile and a half, I basically walked, albeit a brisk, fast-paced walk, which seemed, at the time, way faster than my slow jog. At this point, I just wanted the race to be done. I wanted – NEEDED – to be done. I was crabby because I walked. I was crabby because my stomach was churning over and over and over and all I wanted to do was hurl. I was crabby because every ounce of my body ached. I was crabby because I was thirsty – despite all the water/Gatorade I had. I was crabby because I felt alone – yes, despite the mass amounts of runners and spectators around me. This was the first time ever I felt so alone in a race. Not sure why.

I just wanted to be done and I just wanted my husband. I wanted to curl up in his arms and have him tell me it was all going to be okay. I felt defeated. I felt disappointed. I felt…everything.

Here’s a picture that pretty much sums everything up:

Near the finish line.

Quite a contrast from a picture that was from the start of the race:

At the beginning of the race.

Well, after I crossed the finish line, which I did run across, I guess I was fairly happy because the photographer got this photo:

And I finished!

Truthfully, I don’t even remember this photo begin taken. At this point, I just wanted to find my husband and make our way back to our hotel. Well, I eventually found him, cold, shaking and also very ready to be back at our hotel. Apparently, he ended up in the medical tent with the shakes and shivers and was extremely nauseous. Eventually, he ended up throwing up. Sure wish I had.

Al ended up finishing the race in two hours and five minutes. I finished it in just under three hours – my first predicated finish time (guess I should have just kept it, huh!). My official time was two hours, 59 minutes and 56 seconds!

Despite the fact that I felt disappointed and let down, I will reiterate that I AM VERY PROUD of myself for finishing. I am thankful for the opportunity to be able to run this race. And if truth be told, I am looking forward to the next one!

It’s happening, one week from today…

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I am hoping that at this time next Sunday, I am at some restaurant eating a deliciously high-caloric meal, drinking a large glass of wine and celebrating one of the biggest successes of the past year.

Next Sunday, my husband and I are going to be partaking in our biggest race of the year, of our lifetimes – the Rock ‘n’ Roll Las Vega Marathon and Half-Marathon. Yes, we will be running down Las Vegas Boulevard!

But, we are not doing the marathon, we are only doing the half-marathon! But it’s big enough in my book. And I am just going to say that even though I am excited as hell, I am also scared to death. Although, truthfully, I am not sure why. I guess I have been preparing and training. Well, kind of. Maybe. Okay, I didn’t follow a training plan. At. All. And the farthest I’ve run is only 10 miles. So, am I really ready? Did I really train enough?

I have no idea.

I guess time will tell.

So why a half-marathon in Las Vegas? Because I said if I was going to do a half-marathon, I wanted to do it up big because I have no intentions of ever doing another one. And I guess 35,000+ runners is pretty big!

I like running. Well, okay, I guess I kinda of love it (when I actually get out there and I am doing it!). But, I don’t particularily care for the long distance races. To be honest, I’m really kind of digging the 10K (6.2 miles) distance. It truly is my favorite. I honestly don’t ever see myself doing a full marathon. I really, truly don’t. Why? Not sure. Maybe it’s the training. Maybe it’s because I don’t want to push myself THAT hard.

I think it’s cool that people run full marathons. Those people are inspirations to me. Those types of runners are true athletes, true stars in my book. But I just have no desire to do one – a full marathon, that is.

I am psyched for our half-marathon. I truly am. But will I ever do another one? I guess we’ll just have to see how this one goes!

If you want to check out the Las Vegas run, here’s the website!

November 19, 2008…when it all began!

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So, I guess it’s been awhile, huh? Wow! I guess I let life get in the way. Or, maybe it’s because I’ve been lazy. Or, maybe it’s because I didn’t feel like I had anything else to say. Or, maybe I did’t think anyone was really interested anymore. Whatever the reason, I decided to come back. At least for now. :-)

Although I really don’t want to make any promises, I am going to try – really, really hard – to post at least once a week. Okay? Sound like a plan? Tell you what, I’ll make you a deal…I’ll post once a week if you, my dear readers, promise to check in on me and read what I write and maybe, just maybe, comment once in awhile. Provide me with some feedback. Is it a deal? Yes? Good.

Then, let’s begin.

November 19, 2008. Four years ago today.

Who knew back then how much my life would change? Who knew that walking through the door of my very first Weight Watchers meeting would make that big of a difference? I mean, really, it was supposed to be “just another diet.” Because, let’s face it, I had tried just about every other diet under the sun, why would this one be any different?

Let’s just say, it was different. WAY different.

For starters, it isn’t a diet. I repeat…IT IS NOT A DIET! It is one hundred percent – 100% – a lifestyle change. And if anybody thinks any differently, they don’t want/need it bad enough. That, my dear friends, is the difference.

A DIET. This is where you just want to lose weight as quickly and as effortlessly as possible. No change, really. No learning. No adapting. Not long term. No work. No effort. No desire. Nothing, really. Just get the weight off…fast and with very little effort. Truly, I don’t think I have met one person who has “dieted” and kept the weight off that they lost. Really. Truly. We’ve all been there. We’ve all done that.

A LIFESTYLE CHANGE. This one, on the other hand, takes work – HARD WORK, determination, desire, dedication, a willingness to change, much effort, support, trust and oh-so-much more. Truly, it is one of the hardest things to do short term, let along long term.

I can’t even begin to explain how grateful I am that I decided – FINALLY – to do the lifestyle change and not “just another diet.” It has been one of the most rewarding journeys I have ever taken. Truly. Honestly.

CHANGES over the last four years:

  • No more high blood pressure.
  • No more high blood pressure medication.
  • No more high cholesterol.
  • No more yelling stern talks from my doctor.
  • No more diabetes lingering.
  • No more obesity – yes, I was in the obese category.
  • A healthier body mass index (BMI).
  • Less fat and more muscle.
  • More energy.
  • An expanded, healthier diet – as in the foods I eat on regular basis. (Don’t get me wrong, I still eat my favs – cake, ice cream, cheese, crackers, cookies, chips, etc. Just not on a regular basis.)
  • A more active lifestyle – I am now a runner. (In 2012, my husband and I will have competed in 27 races, ranging from a 1-mile sprint to 5K races, to 10K races, to a 10-mile race, to our first half-marathon!)
  • A new career – I quit my job of 12 years as a newspaper reporter to becoming a leader with Weight Watchers. I now try and do what my leader did for me – give me a life, a much better life.
  • A different and better attitude.
  • More confidence.
  • A better relationship with my husband. (Not that it really could have gotten better as we have a pretty awesome relationship the way it is.)
  • A better outlook on life.
  • An active YMCA membership.

I know I could go on and on with all the changes that have taken place, but I won’t bore you any longer. All I know is that I am glad I walked through that door the very first time and I’m glad I kept walking through it, week after week, year after year. As cliché as it sounds, Weight Watchers truly changed my life. And I know, it’s only going to get better.

 

 

What did I do?

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As the weather warms up, I finally realized it’s time to buckle down and get back on track. Before we know it, summer will be here and that means just one thing – swimsuits!

I am not sure what kind of slump/funk I was in, but I think I have finally snapped out of it. I do blame the weather for putting me there in the first place, which I guess is kind of weird considering we – those of us living in central Minnesota – have had a very pleasant winter. But it seems like the older I get, the more I despise winter. It truly gets me in a bad funk. I need the fresh air – WARM, fresh air. I need the sunshine – the warm, bright sunshine. I just feel better, eat better (as in healthier!), sleep better, exercise better – well, pretty much do everything better in every other season, but winter.

Well, spring is here apparently and I am loving the weather we’ve been having. It has been gorgeous! Summer IS right around the corner, I can smell it and taste it and feel it.

This past weekend, the hubby and I were in Minneapolis. We had a 7K race on Saturday morning and decided to spend the entire weekend in the cities. We had a blast. We ate, we raced, we visited with my brothers and families, we ate, we walked around downtown Minneapolis, we ate and we shopped. We didn’t do a lot of shopping, but enough to please both of us.

There is one purchase I made that SHOCKED me. I. Bought. A. Swimsuit.

Yep, I did it. I went ahead and purchased a new swimsuit. Why? Not entirely sure, but I did. And not just any ‘ol swimsuit. I. Bought. A. (insert throat clear here) BIKINI!

Yep, me. I did it!

First off, keep in mind, that I don’t even wear shorts in the summer. Ever. Yes, even though I have lost 50 pounds, I still don’t wear shorts. I will wear capris. But never shorts. Even when running, I don’t wear shorts. EVER. Second thing to keep in mind, I don’t think I wore a swimsuit once last year. And my husband’s family has a summer cabin on Lake Ida, a beautiful lake near where we live.

So, what possessed me to purchase a new swimsuit, let alone a bikini? I can’t even tell you. I have no idea. I haven’t worn a bikini since I was probably 19 years old. But, I guess I just thought it was time. I still may not like my body, well, it’s more that I despise all the disgusting stretch marks I have. But I also don’t hate it anymore. Yes, just like everyone else, I have flaws, but I’m okay with it. My flaws are me. They make me who I am. They give me character. Plus, really, who am I trying to impress? My husband loves me. ME – not anyone else! And, he loves every last one of my stinking stretch marks.

So, will I wear my new two-piece bathing suit? Maybe. Probably. Hopefully.

Will it be at a public beach? Doubtful. Unless, by chance, I am on vacation somewhere where no one knows me!

If you are wondering what this new swimsuit looks like, I am sorry to disappoint you, but I will not be posting pictures of me in it. I am an open and honest person as many of you know. I will tell you what I weigh (143.8 as of this morning!). I will share my struggles and my triumphs. I will tell what I eat if you ask. I will let you know when I have eaten half a container of ice cream. But there are just some things that can be left alone.

But in case you are really, really wondering what kind of bikini it is, here are pictures I copied from JCP, which is the store I bought it from.

My new bikini top

My new bikini bottom (keep in mind that it actually goes over MY belly button!)

A little apprehensive

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This coming weekend, my hubby and I have a 10K race. I am feeling a little – okay, maybe a lot – anxious about it and for a few different reasons. Reasons, to some, that may sound weird or maybe even, do I dare say, childish?

First off, it is a race we have done before – it is for the Lakes Area Humane Society in Alexandria. However, the last couple of years, we have only done the 5K. For some reason, which now escapes me, we decided to sign up for the 10K. Why, oh why, did we do this?

Yes, I know, I have already completed a 10K so it’s not the distance that is necessarily scaring me. It’s the thought that there won’t be very many people participating in the 10K, which may mean I could come in last. Yep, that’s where the childish-ness may come in. I know that I am not the fastest runner and I am okay with that. I am just darn happy I can finish. However, finishing last in the town where I live when so many people might be watching, that’s another whole thing. I wouldn’t care if I came in last in our upcoming race in Fargo on October 8. It’s in Fargo. Nobody knows me. AND…..there are thousands of participants.

This is in Alexandria. People know me. There may be a hundred people running. UGH! That’s what’s freaking me out. I am almost regretting signing up for the 10K. I wish I would have just signed up for the 5K.

I know what you are probably thinking. “WHO CARES?” I know, right? But I can’t help it. It’s who I am. I don’t want to disappoint anyone. I have been trying to talk myself out of feeling this way for the last two weeks, but as the race gets closer and closer, it’s just not helping.

I know, I am going to be just fine. And who really gives two hoots if I come in last. I am going to be okay. I CAN DO THIS. I know I can.  Right? My goal is to run the whole thing. And as far as my time, I just want to finish in less than one hour and 12 minutes. That is my goal. I CAN DO THIS!

I’ll let you all know what happens after the race on Saturday! Until then, send me some good vibes that the race will go just fine. I would surely appreciate it!

Remember, you can always feel free to email me at celbeam@gmail.com and don’t forget, you can always check on my Facebook page. You can do so by clicking here.

Food on the Fourth

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My last blog post was about my eating habits at the “Lake Place” and how sometimes I can’t control myself. Here’s why:

Food on the Fourth! (And this wasn't all of it!)

As you can see, there is plenty to choose from. By looking at the picture, can you guess what I brought? Yes, of course, the big bowl of fruit and the colorful veggie tray. I made the veggie dip with fat-free sour cream and people actually ate it. I don’t think I heard one complaint.

So, are you wondering how I did? Well, let’s just say it’s a good thing I played several games of volleyball and hopefully worked off at least one of the pieces of cake I ate and at least one of the deliciously good bars I ate! Yes, I ate more than one of each. Oh, and I guess it was a good thing I ran a 5K race Saturday morning, which was the day of our Fourth party.

Yes, I got up early and ran the Shalom Lutheran Church 5K race at 8 a.m. The church is about four blocks from our house, so it was a no-brainer that I would do it. I mean, c’mon, it was THAT close to my house. I wasn’t going to NOT do it. And I am glad I did…it was my best time yet this year. My official time was 31:27. Oh, and if you’re wondering, no, my husband did not run it with me. He slept in. (Him and his college buddy, Dean, may have stayed up a little bit late on Friday night!)

During the party, I also ate lots of fruit and lots of veggies, which by the way, I realized people must not like veggies very much…or at least the veggies I had on my tray. I had red, yellow and green bell peppers, carrots, celery, cucumbers and grape tomatoes. I think all the carrots were gone, but that was about it. I was happy, actually, because I had leftover veggies for the next three days!

But I also realized that people love fruit. I had about a small Cool Whip container left of fruit, which of course, I ate the next morning for breakfast!

All-in-all, I was “okay” with my eating at the Fourth party, but only because of the fact that I got my exercise in. It made me feel much better knowing that I ran and I played tons of volleyball. Because if I didn’t, those four or so pieces of cake I ate would have made me feel a whole heck of a lot guiltier! Plus, my weight probably would have been up more than the .4 (point four) pounds that it was on Wednesday when I weighed in!!!!!!

No joke.

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Yes, I am here. I promise. I know I have been somewhat non-existent lately and I apologize. Again. It seems all my postings lately – albeit few and far between – have included apologies. Wow, not so good on my part, huh?

Well, life has gotten busy. Really busy. I have taken on a couple more meetings. I am now up to 13 meetings per week. Whew! It definitely keeps me hopping. But really, who really cares. Right? The more important question is…how I doing on my healthy living journey? That’s what you really want to know, right?

I will tell you. Honestly. Because that is what I do. Right? I have always been honest and forthcoming and I don’t ever plan on changing that. So, if I must be honest, I am struggling. Why? Probably because of a lack of motivation. A lack of time. A lack of energy. A lack of …blah, blah, blah. AND, because I am so friggin’ tired of cold, windy, snowy, cloudy and just plain ol’ yucky weather. I really let this winter get me down and I am not sure why. But honestly, it sucks. Plain and simple.

But here’s the deal. I am still doing well, I haven’t gained, I am eating healthy (for the most part!) and I still feel pretty decent. I am craving exercise and I know I just have to make time for it, but I haven’t found the motivation I once had. Somehow, along the way, I lost it. But not all of it. It’s still there. Somewhere deep inside. I just have to find it again.

On March 19, my husband and I ran our first race of the season – the Get Lucky 7K race in Minneapolis. It, obviously, wasn’t my best run, but I have to tell you, I enjoyed it way more than I expected. Running that race reminded me how much I do actually like to run. Not necessarily love, mind you, but I do actually like it. Prior to that race, I had only ran once since November, so I was incredibly out of shape. But I still did okay. My husband finished in 49:05 and I finished in 51:49. Like I said, not bad, but it could have been oh-so-much-better!

So, after the race, I was really excited to get out and start running again. I was really looking forward to it. And then…STUPID WINTER hit again. Seriously, I have so had enough. ENOUGH! If I could strangle Mother Nature, I probably would. But enough about that. I am not going to stew over the ridiculously cold, snowy and miserable winter we have had to endure this year.

My goal, starting on April 1, is to get outside and run at least three times per week. And I will do it. I will. I have to. I must. I want to. I NEED TO!

So that is that, people. It’s no joke. April 1 is it. Time to get back to it. Time to focus on me again. Time to get in shape and shape up! Enough is enough.

Oh, I also need to mention that I am going to try to keep this blog up better than I have been. My goal is to blog at least once a week. Starting Friday, April 1, my plan is to blog at least once a week – on Fridays. So there, I said it. I told you all. Now I have to, right? Right! Now, you can look forward to hearing from me every Friday. If you want to hear more from me, I post more often on my Confessions of a [former] Fat Girl Facebook site, which you can find here.

Take care my dear readers. And I really do apologize for not keeping this blog as up-to-date as I should. If you feel like sharing any thoughts, tips, concerns or whatever, please feel free to leave a comment or send an email to me at confessionsofaformerfatgirl@gmail.com.

Have a wonderful week!

Shame on me

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Dear readers…

First, I will apologize for not posting in what seems like forever. Shame on me. I guess I let life take over and I shouldn’t have. But, I am here. I am posting. And I am filling  you in on what’s going on.

Well, where to start. I guess I will start by saying that my new job as a leader for Weight Watchers is awesome. It is such an honor to be able to try and help those who are just starting out on their healthy living journey or even those who have been on the journey for awhile or even those who are at the same point I am at…struggling to maintain the healthy living lifestyle we worked so hard to achieve.

I am amazed and inspired by my groups. For those of you who don’t know, I recently quit my newspaper reporter job of nearly 12 years to become a full-time leader with Weight Watchers. I now work at 12 meetings per week…three of those I do the reception work, not the leading. I am the leader, however, at nine meetings per week. In case you want to know, here is a look at my schedule:

Mondays: Leader at two meetings – one at an “at work/community” at Central MN Credit Union in Melrose and one at what we call a “trad” meeting, meaning traditional, at the Senior Center in Sauk Centre. An “at work” is where I go to the business and hold a meeting for employees. Most at works now are called at work/community meetings because the meeting is open to employees as well as people in the community.

Tuesdays: Leader at three meetings – one at an at work/community at Broadway Medical Center; one at an at work at the U of M in Morris; and one at a trad meeting at the library in Morris.

Wednesdays: Receptionist at three trad meetings in Alexandria at the Senior Center and leader at one meeting – an at work/community in Wheaton.

Thursdays: Leader at three meetings – one at an at work at Encore Capital Group in St. Cloud; one at an at work at Wolters Kluwer in St. Cloud; and one at a trad meeting in Glenwood at the hospital.

Fridays: I was supposed to have Fridays off, but I am temporarily helping out in St. Cloud. I am now the leader for the Friday meeting at the center, which is literally its own center with a sign out front and everything. Kind of cool.

So, yes, I am a tad busy, but man, I am SO loving it. It is such an invigorating, inspiring, motivating and empowering job. Especially when I have members who no longer have to take medication for high blood pressure or medication for high cholesterol or members who don’t have to take as much medication for their diabetes. Or the members who didn’t think exercise was a possibility and now, they are running races. It’s amazing what this job does for a person’s heart and soul.

However, I think it is time for me to take my own advice. I need to put into practice what I am preaching. I have to admit, I have been struggling…a little. Not a lot. My eating has faltered on occasion and the exercise…well, it’s been next to nothing. My husband made me go out and run with him on Saturday and man, oh, man did that feel good. It was the best run I’ve ever had, but I did it and it felt great. Until the next day, anyway. My legs were killing me. But it felt good to feel that pain again. It’s not a “real” pain, it’s that oh-my-goodness-I-actually-worked-out pain. It truly was awesome.

So, as winter is winding down (or at least it dang well better be), I am looking forward to a wonderful spring and summer season filled with as many races as last year (eight 5K’s and one 10K), if not more. The season is starting out pretty good as we – my husband and I – are already registered for three races: a 7K run on March 19; a 5K run on May 13; and a 5K run on May 20. We are also doing the Susan G. Komen 5K walk on Mother’s Day with family and friends in memory of my sister, Donna, who passed away from breast cancer on January 31 of this year.

So, are running schedule is filling up and I can’t wait! If you have any races planned in your future, let me know about them. Either send me an email to confessionsofaformerfatgirl@gmail.com or post it on my Confessions of a [former] Fat Girl Facebook site. You can click here to do that. Thanks much!

Struggling

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Alright, it’s time for a little confessing from the Confessions girl herself.

For the past couple of weeks, I have really been struggling. I have taken on an “I don’t care attitude” and now, I am struggling to get rid of it, to snap out of it and to get back on track.

To be honest, a lot of it has to do with when my sister’s health started to decline and then with losing her, it has only gotten worse. I know it shouldn’t. I know I need to snap out of it. I know she would want me to, but you know what, it’s really hard. Really. Hard. It hurts so much.

There is another reason, too. As many of you know, I have been working two jobs for quite some time. The last few months have been a whirlwind and I haven’t taken any time for me. I know that sounds kind of selfish, but I have admitted several times that I am selfish person. I need me time. It’s just that simple. Well, kind of. When I say I need “me time,” I mean I need time for me to exercise and I haven’t had that. Okay, it may sound like I am making excuses, but really, I am not. Well, okay, maybe a little.

I am hoping all that changes next week when I will only be working ONE job. As much as I am going to miss the newspaper…and let me tell you, I AM GOING TO MISS IT…I am going to be really happy to only have one job to worry about. AND to devote my time and energy to. For the last few months, I haven’t been able to give 100 percent of me to either job and that has been a struggle for me. I am not that person. I need to give 100 percent or more to what I do and I haven’t been able to do that. I believe that has also contributed to my “I don’t care attitude.” Why? I’m not sure. But it has. And to be honest, it sucks.

Since I made the decision to quit the newspaper, which was a hard decision, believe it or not, I keep telling myself that this insanity of a life I’ve been living will soon end. That is what has kept me going, although it hasn’t done much in the way of helping my eating habits or my exercise habits. When I got off track, I REALLY GOT OFF TRACK. And it has been a struggle to try and get back on.

My eating has been non-stop and my exercising has been non-existent. But I am going to get back on track. I am going to start eating right again. I am going to start exercising again. Yes, as most of you know, I have a race coming up. And yes, it is scaring the heck out of me. AARGH!!!! How did I let myself get so off track?

Okay, so this blog post has been a bunch of babbling and muttering and so it must end. Friday, February 11. I just need to make it until then. Well, actually, I have to make it through the weekend, which isn’t going to be easy. We are finally saying goodbye to my sister…her “Celebration of Life” service is Saturday.

I can do it. I can make it. I can get back on track. I will start eating right. I will start exercising. I will change. It’s a new day and only I can make it what I want to get out of it. If it’s meant to be, it is up to me.

I can. I will. I need to. I want to. Period.