Monthly Archives: April 2009

Mirrors vs. photographs

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How come the image I see in the mirror looks so much better than the image I see in a photograph?
I always thought mirrors were the mastermind of deception and distortion and that photos weren’t so bad.

I’ve changed my mind. Mirrors really aren’t that bad and photos, well, they kind of suck.

This past weekend, we celebrated my mom’s 75th birthday. I bought a new shirt (it was kind of hip and not something I would typically wear) and I wore my new jeans, which were a size smaller I might add.

My two older sisters were going to be there and I knew we would take pictures; we always do, which is why I wore the new shirt and jeans. My one sister always looks so good – sophisticated and put together. She’s not stick thin, but not fat either. She’s average in size. My other sister just lost more than 30 pounds and is smaller than me and my other sister. She usually looks good, too.

When I looked in the mirror that morning, I was pleased with the image staring back at me. I looked like I had lost some weight, my outfit was cute, I just had a pedicure, which was shown off in my open-toe platform sandals and my hair actually worked out. I guess I was pretty happy with how I looked…not something I do on a regular basis.

At any rate, the party went great, I even heard a few comments about my looks, good comments. The photographs were taken and I was feeling good, happy.

At home that evening, I uploaded the photos we took, the ones of the three sisters, and my happiness balloon deflated within seconds. Seriously, the photo looked like I instantly gained back the nearly 25 pounds I lost. I still looked the same. I didn’t look like the girl I saw in the mirror that morning. I didn’t look like I changed at all. I still looked, well, FAT. It sucked. My sisters, on the other hand, both looked great…as usual.

Yes, that is jealousy rearing its ugly head. Fun, isn’t it.

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Short and sweet

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Went to the DQ today. Had to try the new midnight truffle blizzard. Ordered a small. Ate all of it. Not too bad.

Went for a walk tonight. Ended up walking nearly five miles. According to my Garmin, I burned 662 calories.

Went on my computer and looked up how many calories in a small midnight truffle blizzard. It was 770.

That sucks.

Foods I never thought I’d eat

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Have you ever heard of a Boca burger? I have and I used to tease my husband (who was then just my boyfriend) about eating them. He used to eat them all the time. I never actually tried one, but they looked, oh, I don’t know, weird. Almost cardboard-ish. Not appetizing at all. If I was going to eat a burger, I wanted it to be real hamburger…grease and all.

Well, times have changed and so have I. Guess who’s eating Boca burgers now? Yep. Me. And, I have to say they are actually good. Real good. And they don’t taste anything like cardboard. At least not the flame-grilled Boca burger. The first one I ate was on Monday. I put a little pickle on it and some ketchup and put it on an Arnold’s Sandwich thin…it’s like a bun, but way thinner and way better for you. Again, something I wouldn’t have eaten a year ago. The sandwich made for a great lunch and it was low in WW points.

I had another one yesterday. This time, I added a slice of good-for-you cheese. Again, something I wouldn’t have eaten not so long ago. I am a cheese freak and I have always said, if it’s not real cheese, then I am not having it. Well, that went out the window, too. I now eat fat-free Feta cheese instead of the real stuff and it actually tastes better. Not so pungent. I eat low-fat sliced cheese and low-fat string cheese. It’s so weird.

Today, I went to Jimmy John’s….a place I really don’t care for. But, I heard they had this thing called an Unwich. An un-what? Yep, an Unwich. It’s a sandwich without the bun and let me tell you, it was AWESOME! Seriously. It is now my new favorite sandwich…er..Unwich!

Whipped up obsession

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Okay, I have finally come to realize I have a major obsession with Cool Whip. Since I started my whole healthy eating journey, I haven’t allowed myself to eat Cool Whip. Period. I LOVE the stuff. Period.

Typically, once I start eating it, I can’t stop and end up eating the entire container. I remember when I was little, on the night before Thanksgiving, I snuck into the refrigerator, stole the container of Cool Whip and ate the whole thing. My mom was not very happy. Especially because I think I did this on more than one occasion.

Well, I have found that the fat free kind tastes the same as the regular (or at least my tastebuds think so anyway) and it is very low in WW points – as in zero for 2 tablespoons. I bought my first container about a month ago and since then, I think I have purchased oh, probably five or six or maybe even seven.

I found that one cup of frozen blackberries mixed with a carefully measured out 1/2 cup of Fat Free Cool Whip (one WW point) made for one delicious treat and cured my hankering for ice cream.

However, I also found out that Cool Whip goes well with bananas and sugar-free Hershey’s syrup and it goes well with strawberries and it goes well with any chocolate Vitalicious VitaTops (theses are good-for-you muffin tops that are 100 calories and are also chocked full of vitamins…they can mostly be found online,  but are available in a few select grocery stores), and many other "treats." 

When I first starting eating my Fat Free Cool Whip, I literally and carefully measured out 1/2 cup. Now, not so much. I have also started sneaking a teaspoon here or a tablespoon there. So, I have decided that the container in my refrigerator will be the last one for awhile. The darn stuff is too good and too tempting for me to sneak. I just can’t help myself. I am truly obsessed with it.

I wish I could be that obsessed with exercise!

DELICIOUS!

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Well, I made it through hosting my first family holiday…Easter! 

There were nine of us total, which is a pretty small crowd for my normally large family gatherings. The food was fantastic. I made a ham, of course! (See picture…it was just too pretty not to take a picture of it!) I also made riced potatoes, plain steamed green beans, roasted asparagus with balsamic vinegar and a little shredded parmesan cheese, roasted sweet potatoes, Jell-O and strawberry shortcake for dessert. Everything was pretty healthy, yet super delicious. I was so excited. And my family loved the meal. Or at least they said they did anyway! It’s neat to know that you can make a holiday meal and make it healthy. Now, they want me to host Thanksgiving! I said, "No thanks!" : – )

 

What do you see?

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Earlier this week, a good friend of mine asked me a question that has been weighing heavily on my mind. I can’t remember her exact words, but it was something like this, "Are you ever going to see yourself as anything but fat?"

I know I answered her, with probably not the answer she was looking for, but now, almost every day, I have really paid attention to what or who I see in the mirror. 

I am beginning to like what I see. I don’t LOVE it. Not yet. But I can see that I have lost weight. I can also still see that I jiggle and wiggle in all the wrong places. And I am in need of some serious toning. But I am making progress.

When I look in the mirror, I see more smiles and oftentimes, when I wear something that I like, I think to myself, "Damn, I look kind of good." Or at least I know I feel good, anyway. I don’t feel ashamed anymore.

My clothes are starting to fit like they should…some are actually too big and I can’t wear them anymore. Kind of sucks because I can’t go out and buy a whole new wardrobe. But it’s awesome because I can button and zip things that I couldn’t before. I don’t feel like I have to hide in my clothes…or at least not as much as I used to.

But as far as how I see myself…the answer is yes, I still SEE the "fat" person. I know I am not obese and there are people who are larger than me, but I don’t – and probably won’t ever – see skinny when I see me.

Not worried anymore

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So Easter is this Sunday and I am actually excited and not worried anymore about what I am going to eat or how many calories I am going to consume!

Why? Because I am going to be hosting Easter for my family. Long story short, there is only going to be a small group so I offered to have my family come to my house. Actually, this is the first time I am hosting a holiday for my family and I am quite excited. I have a somewhat large family – there are seven siblings total – and of course, there’s mom and dad, too. When you add in spouses and kids, there gets to be quite a crew. Well, there is only going to be nine of us – total!

Because I am hosting the event, I get to choose the menu. I get to decide if the green beans are going to be slathered in soup and loaded with those fried onion ring things. I get to decide if the sweet potatoes are going to be smothered in butter, brown sugar and marshmallows. I get to decide if the potatoes are going to be drowning in butter and cheese. I get to decide if the fruit salad is good or bad. And I get to decide if we eat apple, pumpkin, cherry or banana cream pie for dessert.

I can bet you already know what I am deciding to do.

The green beans are simply going to be steamed. The sweet potatoes won’t have a lick of fat on them; they are going to be roasted in the oven with a dash of sea salt sprinkled on top. The potatoes are going to be boiled and then riced, just like my grandma used to make, fluffy as ever. (My mom is going to make gravy for those who want it!) The fruit salad will consist of sugar free Jell-O mixed with oh-so-good-for-you blackberries and maybe some raspberries tossed in, too. The dessert will be a lovely angel food cake with some strawberries and fat free Cool Whip added for good measure. And, of course, there will be a veggie tray filled with carrots, tomatoes, broccoli and cauliflower. Maybe even some green and red peppers thrown in for good measure.

Oh, and of course, there is going to be ham! Easter wouldn’t be Easter without a delicious ham. But it won’t be soaking in a butter and brown sugar glaze. If fact, the only glaze will be from the fresh pineapple slices beautifully browned on top.

I am so excited about making a beautiful, delicious, scrumptious dinner for my family. And my mom is excited, too. She has diabetes and now she can eat her favorite foods without wondering what her sugar levels are going to do. 

I hope my other families members enjoy the meal as much as I know I am going to. I’ll keep you posted!